ATL - Like Riding a Bike

It has been 14 months since I have seen the streets of HOTLANTA!  I remember driving away from my beautiful Decatur apartment, with tears in my eyes, thinking, "I'll be right back!"  But, I wasn't.  Now, going back for less than 48 hours, I knew I had to make the most of it and was nervous I would forget what I was doing.

Stepping off the plane, it felt like home.  The scents of the Popeye's Chicken and Dunkin' Donuts of the Airtran C terminal made me smile.  (Why does Airtran get that when Delta terminals have Lacoste, Starbucks, and Cafe Intermezzo)?

The New:

• Atlanta airport built a SKY TRAIN to the rental car facility!  It was like future world and felt like we were on a roller coaster!  Much more awesome than riding MARTA, but it did lack the classic ATL gems like this girl: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rQWc3MWQxtU  We picked up our Toyota Camry (only $9.70 in gas for the whole weekend), and drove off.

• The second "new" thing in Atlanta was Piedmont park!  Piedmont park was always awesome, but since I left it DOUBLED in size!  I still don't understand how this was possible because it is a giant park in the middle of urban Atlanta.  That's like me getting back to New York and someone telling me they expanded central park. Where did this land come from that I am standing on?  I'll never know, but it was beautiful.

I even got to play in the new fountain!!

• The third new thing was they finally built a TRAFFIC CIRCLE in place of a 5 way stop light.  This was a brilliant idea that really took much too long to put in place.  Florida gets traffic circles - and those people are all old and can barely figure out common traffic laws to begin with like signaling, not swerving into other lanes, and obeying minimum speed signs.  I think if they can handle a traffic circle, a bunch of students from a top university can handle it.  Finally, good move, Emory.

• The final new thing that I got to try was the Decatur Diner.  This place taunted me for months when a giant "Coming Soon - 24 hour diner" sign was put up across the street from my old apartment nearly 4 months before I moved away.  I was so excited to try it but day after day, the sign remained but the diner did not open.  A 24 hour diner next door would change anyone's life... I don't even have that in New York.  

Happily, I tried the late night gyros.  I stayed away from the Greek potatoes, though.  Ick.

The Old

• What was the first thing we decided to do when we arrived at 10pm?  Have a heavy Italian dinner.  Many advised against this plan, but I think it was necessary.  Especially since it came with a glass of wine to cure my headache.  After Capozzi's, we went to Virginia Highlands for some drinks at Fontaine's.  It was crowded, smokey, and filled with drunks... just like good old times!

• Dragged myself out of bed for a boxing class at the old gym.  Putting on the gloves, I was so excited that I barely noticed the crusted sweat and blood of the stinky old gym gloves I was forced to borrow. I was nervous as I got in the ring to do a combo with my trainer, Terri.  Jab. Step. Right. Low hook. Duck. Hook. Right. Step. Jab.  It came back quickly.  As I punched and ducked I heard Lynsey cheer, "it's like riding a bicycle!"  I could have done it all day.

• A bowling alley - something New York doesn't have.  But Shaina, your firm had a bowling event in times square, and there are many bowling alleys in Manhattan.  No, there are not.  There are clubs where people are allowed to throw a ball down a lane and hit pins.  These places are for drinking and schmoozing.  They are not bowling alleys.  Midtown bowl is a real bowling alley.  It's a place where we ate tater tots and sweet potato fries.  It's a place where they show football games on TV screens.  It's a place where no one dresses up.  It's a place where I got XXXX - 4 strikes in a row!  A Turkey +!  

• The haircut.  Oh yeah, it was worth the wait.  If you're confused, you don't read my blog enough.  See http://shainainnewyork.blogspot.com/2011/09/stalker.html

• My home.  The Ponce.  I have the best tenant ever living there.  When he told me he would use the second bedroom as a music studio, I pictured a few guitars, maybe a keyboard.  Instead, the room is filled with two full sized orchestral xylophones, a string instrument I've never heard of, an electric drum set, and a cello.  I know my place is in good hands.  :)

• Juddy Wuddy Puddy Pie.  The best - as always!

The Merry

So, let's not forget why we came to ATL this weekend... Danielle's wedding!  She was a beautiful bride and looked like she was having the time of her life all night.  Congratulations, Danielle and Kevin!!

We enjoyed the lovely Peachtree club with a pre-reception libation at the Empire State South restaurant.  Yep.  Empire State SOUTH.  I've been informed that people call Georgia that.  Why?  Perhaps it's like people at any number of Georgia's small universities that joke about being the Harvard of the south.  This just doesn't make any sense.

 

This place was absolutely nothing like New York.  We purchased drinks that took 15 minutes to carefully craft and prepare.  We watched the bartender light an orange on fire, just to rub it around the side of the glass.  We watched him carefully crack a brown-egg white into the glass.  We watched him meticulously stir the cocktail 100 times exactly.  This process was worth about $30 in labor cost alone (not to mention the price of the pumpkin gastrique and mexi coke reduction).  What was the total cost of one of these drinks?  $8.  Middle. Of. Atlanta.  That's what I'm talking about!

 

The view from the top of the club was amazing!  We saw stone mountain in the background!  I miss you, ATL!

Extreme Halloweeeen!

Why do I love Halloween so much?  My dad.  Ever since I was young, my dad has gone all-out each October 31.  I don't mean he dresses up to take me trick or treating.  I mean 8am on Halloween morning, he puts on his outrageous outfit for the year...and goes to work.

What does my dad do that he can wear a full costume to work?  Well, you see, he's a doctor.  Is it normal for a doctor to dress up and see patients all day?  I'm not sure but I don't think so.  He schedules long office hours every Halloween, makes sure he goes to do his rounds at the hospital and every nursing home in the city, and tries to schedule a poker game or two... just so that he can expand his audience.

It started off relatively simply - a clown suit, a pumpkin, a ghost.  But, his costumes have recently evolved to a whole new level.

A "Chinese man" is one of our family's favorites.  In fact, I loved this costume so much, I framed this picture and had it in my house.  I finally took it down after I kept telling people it was a picture of my dad and they would ask whether I was adopted.  Seriously?


Another cute costume was everyone's favorite little girl.  GS did not just stand for Glenn Stahl, but for Girl Scout.

 


But, this was not the first time my father dressed in drag for Halloween.  I believe the all-time record for most outrageous costume was when he went as one of my favorite characters.... Tink.

This year... he did it again.  As a doctor, he thought it would be funny to go as someone with three arms.  But was it a gross, scary, Halloween costume?

Nope.  Presenting: Miss Diagnosed!

He even shaved "LOVE" into his moustache.

Inspired by his enthusiasm for the holiday, I always try to be a good sport, but never dress up to go to places such as the hospital, school, or work.  This year, I know I made my dad proud.  We got an email at work saying there would be a Halloween party with a costume contest.  First place gets tickets to WICKED!

I quickly convinced my officemate to dress up with me.  I had the outfits for Mike and my costume, but we wanted to put a different spin on them.  We showed up at the party, proudly, as Mario and Luigi from Mario, Luigi, and Bockius, LLP.

We walked out as first place winners!  (Credit goes to Kelly Gold for designing our ML&B signs).

To make this Halloween even more crazy, we had a SNOW STORM!  We braved the snow and sleet, just as Mario and Luigi would.

Driving Mario Kart Style.  Mike says, "You take the wheel, I'll throw the bananas!"

Jess was a pinata!

Some people find this picture funny.

We had such a good time dressing up in our Mario and Luigi costume that we decided to sign up to be on the trick-or-treat list for our building.  It was fun handing out candy to cute little kids until a group of boys came to our door.  "Trick-or-treee."  They stopped suddenly when they saw me.  One of the boys was dressed as Mario!  "Nice costume!" I said excitedly.  They stood there staring at my fake moustache until "Mario" finally whispered to his friend, "She's bisexual!"

It's cross-dresser, kid.  Guess I'm my father's daughter after all.

What a trip

Take off your shoes.  Take off your jacket.  Take out your computer.  Take out your liquids.  Everyone has his or her own story about the security line at the airport.  I have a few of my favorites.

One

In college, for some reason, we liked to take silverware from restaurants.  On a particularly nice evening, Jeanice was able to slip a fat steak knife into her purse.  This was the day before Thanksgiving break in 2001 – two months after 9/11. 

Of course, when she shows up at security (forgetful Jeanice – never taking anything out of her purse) the “friendly” TSA agent finds the knife.  Her Arab last name did not help the situation.  As the agent began searching through her purse.  He opened her wallet and pulled out her multiple fake ID’s. 

It’s a miracle she made her flight on time.  Or did she?  I can’t remember.

Two

The day after Thanksgiving 2008.  No liquids are allowed through security.  I’m flying back to Emory from Thanksgiving with my family – leftover turkey sandwich and fixings in tow.

I slide my bag into the scanner and when it emerges on the other side, a man reaches in and swiftly pulls out my Tupperware of cranberry sauce.  “No liquids.”  He says as he tosses it into the garbage before I could argue.  I stand there with my mouth open.  Then I begin to cry.

I definitely would have stood there and finished off all the cranberry.  I have been known to open a can of jellied cranberry and finish it off as a snack.  Oh the injustice by the TSA!

Three

Spring 2006.  My mom is carrying seven bags through the airport.  Why doesn’t she just use one big bag?  We’ll never know.  She has a purse, a pilot case, her franklin organizer (yep, 2006), multiple shopping bags, and 3 coats and sweaters (even though she’s traveling from Miami to Hawaii via Houston).

Since she clearly looks suspicious, she is pulled over for a more thorough search.  Does this bother her?  No.  “Sir, since you’re looking, I have a chocolate bar in one of these bags, can you find it for me?”  Right, TSA has time to look for your chocolate bar.  They’re not busy keeping our air safe or anything.

Four

Leaving the most wonderful vacation with my whole family, Mike, and the beach, I was planning on catching the 6am flight back to New York.  This flight requires me to get off the airplane, finagle my way onto the $12 bus, and show up at work around 10:40 – hoping that no one notices.  I figured after a week away, no one would remember that I worked there anyway.  Nevertheless, I had no option to stop at home and drop off my suitcase – it was definitely straight to the office.

Mike, being the wonderful man that he is, offered to help me because he was going back a day early.  I excitedly took him up on his offer before he could take it back.  I packed up my only-technically-carry-on sized, bright pink suitcase and sent him on his way. 

I didn’t think twice about the potential security problems until I got a text, “A cheese grater, really?!”  Oops.  Yeah, I guess my mom gave me one of those to bring back.  Oh, and my ankle weights look like bombs?  Yeah, sorry about that. 

Dentist!

Some people can’t open their mouth very wide.  Some people hate the sound of drills.  Some people hate fresh breath (you know who you are).  I have none of these problems – I love the dentist!

Since I was a kid, I loved the feeling of getting my teeth cleaned.  The grit of the flavored polish (strawberry or coconut… anything but bubblegum) between my teeth left me giddy for days.  The burning sensation of the fluoride rinse – even after 45 seconds of swishing – was the part I most looked forward to.  As I left the dentist, I would always grab as many toys as I could out of the kangaroo pouch (usually about three, which frequently included a bouncy ball, stickers, and one of those gummy spiders you could throw against the wall and it would slowly fall down.  Those things are so cool!  Anyone know where I can find one?).

Perhaps my love for the dentist is only because I am fortunate enough to have never needed braces, have had only one cavity (when I was 17 and old enough not to be traumatized), and went to a dentist with bird and fish mobiles hanging from the ceiling.  It might also be that I just prefer strange things and always have – spinach over chocolate; tofu over hamburgers; and the Disney channel over something more age appropriate (for a 30 year old). 

Needless to say, when I made my first dentist appointment in New York, I couldn’t wait.  Since everything in New York is more expensive than anywhere else, I have been holding off on the dentist.  A Groupon came out and for $36 I bought a cleaning, exam, and x-rays.  The second I bought it – before the deal was even closed – I called and booked the next appointment.  I waited for a week, and yesterday was the day I finally got to go!

I arrived anticipating running my tongue over completely plaque-free pearly-whites.  The office was small and cramped, but most places in New York are.  After waiting nearly 30 min (don’t they know I bill every 6 min of my time?) I got to sit down in the chair!  I put up with the x-rays until the dentist finally came in.  She was young and was happy to answer all of my questions.  I was shocked when she said she would be doing my cleaning herself – I’m used to a hygienist.  I opened my mouth and looked up at the flat screen on the ceiling playing Judge Joe Brown.  This was very different from the fish mobiles in the large glass building surrounded by Palm Trees that I was used to.

She started the cleaning and immediately I felt like it was not what I was used to.  The sharp pick that squirted water was moving much faster and much harder than I was used to.  I winced and held my breath for a while.  When I opened my eyes, I saw the dentist shaking her head.  “ooooaat?”  I asked.  No response.  “Oooaaay yooo aaaaiinnn oorrr eeeaad?”  I asked louder.  “Too much blood,” she mumbled.  Keeping my head still, I darted my eyes to her gloved hands that were moving in and out of my mouth.  They were covered in blood and more was spraying on them every second.

I began to panic.  This is bad.  A little blood is normal but this isn’t.  What if the instruments aren’t clean?  What if I don’t stop bleeding?  What if this hurts?  She finally stopped with the pick axe and began the polishing.  That was only slightly more comfortable.  Fortunately, it was the fastest cleaning I ever had.  “There you go, all done.”  She said, “See you in 6 months.”  She had left the room.  I was feeling empty inside.  That’s all?  I wasn’t expecting a toy at my age, but where was my free toothbrush?  Or my floss?  I sighed and walked back to work.

On the street outside, I ran my tongue across the front of my no longer bloody teeth.  I crunched down on a bit of grit leftover from the polish.  I smiled.

Camp Anawanna

Two weekends ago we went camping for likely the last time this season!  After months of sweltering heat, of course, a cold front comes through on our camping weekend so we're stuck in sweat shirts huddled over night in 40 degree weather!

Nevertheless, it's nice to go camping with the group because everyone else is prepared with things like food and fire.  All I have to do is show up with my two bedroom 10' x 15' luxury tent and queen sized air mattress.

It's usually nice to have a bedroom and a living room in the middle of the woods.  Our luxurious digs felt even better when we set up on the edge of a stream.  Our campground was likely flooded a few weeks earlier with the hurricane, but now, the stream was just a little trickle - it didn't even overflow when the boys on our trip put an extra little trickle in it.

When we arrived, our camping buddies already had the fire going so we were free to go play frisbee and explore.

This campground was slightly different because apparently people actually lived there!  Double wide trailers with tacky lawn ornaments dominated the area.  I didn't understand.  You live in a trailer in the woods!  Why would you ruin that with plastic flamingos and rainbow pinwheels?!

An old boat (we were many miles from the ocean) laid in the middle of a clearing.  "Where do you think that boat travels?"  I asked.  "Where do you think that  boat travels?"  Mike responds pointing to a wooden pirate ship with a life sized Jesus cross.  I immediately declared myself captain!

The fun started at night when we strung christmas lights and turned on a strobe light.  Pink Floyd began playing in the background.  That's when I realized that Pink Floyd is basically the same as the "halloween" soundtrack that people play at haunted houses.  There was only slightly less moaning.  I gobbled my spicy hot dogs and chili.  Then we got to make s'mores (or shmores as my mom calls them).

I slept very well listening to the sounds of the stream with 4 blankets piled on top of me.

Bienvenido a Miami

I've been in Miami for a few days now.  Hooray for vacation!  As always, the weather is humid and the people are... non-English speakers.  I LOVE IT!  New York has some beautiful city views, but Miami ain't bad.

Because I love Morgan Lewis and want to see every office possible (See Shainainjapan for visit to Tokyo office) I made arrangements to visit the Miami office!  I had befriended a first year associate who let me know that I could stop by anytime and on Wednesdays the whole firm had lunch together.  I was really excited about the idea of getting to meet everyone at once!  My friends back in New York told me I would look like a loser showing up at work on my vacation for a lunch.  "Hey guys," they teased, "I'm just here on my vacation for a free lunch."

They didn't bother me enough to not show up.  I really enjoyed seeing a different office that was the same - yet SO different.  First of all, you all know how much I hate going up to the 44th floor in my New York office.  The Miami office is on an even HIGHER floor!  53!  I had to take three elevators just to get there.  (Not kidding).

(They work on the top floors of this building!)

I bet you're wondering what they served everyone for lunch.  Pizza and champagne!  Not bad for a Wednesday afternoon.  Gotta love Morgan Lewis!

Stalker

I’ve had a lot of bad haircuts in my life.  They began when my mother used to cut my hair – she would place a bowl over my head and chop around it so that I had bangs all the way past the back of my ears.  My mullet-esque haircut changed only slightly by the time I was 10 when my mom pulled down my wet bangs and cut them where they should have been when dry.  Of course, they sprung up and looked like porcupine quills shooting out of my hairline.

My worst haircut was in eighth grade – unfortunately right when I became interested in boys.  People said I looked like a Beatle (John?  Ringo?) or a lion (to be fair, some still say this).  My friends who knew me back then STILL remind me of how bad I looked.

I finally learned how to use a straightening iron and grew my hair long.  Since then, I haven’t had a bad haircut.  I also haven’t had a great one – they’ve all been pretty much the same.  All the $5 haircuts and the $50 haircuts were certainly workable as long as the haircutter did not cut off too much hair!

Once I moved to Atlanta, I had a few haircuts before walking into Oh La La Salon.  I was a walk-in and a super cute, giggly, slightly goth looking girl about my age named Meg was available for my haircut.  “Just don’t cut it too short!”  I asked, as always.  “Don’t worry,” she reassured me, “I understand, and I won’t do anything you won’t like!”  We spent the haircut gossiping and had a really fun time.  When she turned me around after the blow dry, my mouth dropped!  She did such a great job that I actually went back to HER again.  Going back to the same stylist was something I hadn’t done since I was forced to use the dictator of haircutters – my mom.  I knew I would never have to change hair stylists again.

After having Meg cut my hair twice, I went back for my third haircut with her.  I walked into Oh La La, but she wasn’t there, so I decided to schedule an appointment for a later date.  “Meg doesn’t work here anymore,” the receptionist told me.  What?!  She could tell how upset I was after pleading with her to tell me where I could find her.  Finally, after the salon owner vanished in the back, she whispered to me, “try Grow down the street – she’s cutting hair there now.”  I was so excited as I called Grow and made my appointment.

When I showed up, Meg was shocked that I found her and followed her to a different salon (that was no longer within walking distance of my house).  She told me how much happier she was at the new salon and I agreed that it was nicer.  I was so happy to have found her and knew that I would never have to change hair stylists again.

For my next haircut, I called Grow to schedule an appointment.  “Meg doesn’t work here anymore,” the receptionist at grow told me.  Is it really happening AGAIN?!  “What salon did she move to?” I begged, but the woman told me she had stopped cutting hair.  I was devastated.  The woman, however, did give me her cell phone number in case I wanted to call her.  I was nervous, but I called her.  “Hi, um, this is, um, Shaina, the girl who followed you to the other hair salon.”  Fortunately, she remembered me, didn’t think I was crazy and told me she wasn’t working at a salon but would come to my house to cut my hair!  I was so happy!  She was going to come to my house and I knew that I would never have to change hair stylist again.

Once again, she gave me a fantastic haircut and did not even make fun of me for eating spam fried rice that I had made, although she did politely decline when I offered some to her.  This time, she did the best job she had ever done.  I was so happy with my haircut, although I was sad because I was leaving Atlanta and moving to New York.  To keep in touch, we became facebook friends.  Nothing is more permanent than facebook, so I knew that I would always be able to find her and never have to change my hair stylist again.

(right after my hair cut)

After three mediocre haircuts in New York (yes, it’s true), I knew that as soon as I went back to visit Atlanta, I would get Meg to cut my hair.  I had been seeing periodic facebook updates from her, so when I decided to organize my November trip to Atlanta, I planned to facebook her.  Yesterday, I opened up facebook to send her a message and when I was typing her name, her account did not show up.  I figured I must have been spelling it wrong or she changed her name like some people do.  You know what I mean – if I did it my name would be “Shhh Aina”

Anyway, when her name didn’t come up, I looked up an old message we had sent to each other.  When I found it, my heart dropped.  Her name was blanked out – she had deleted her facebook account.  I began to panic.  Not again!  How am I going to find her this time?!  I began a googling frenzy.

I found an old linked in profile that I thought was hers, but there was no messaging function for it.  I tried to request her as a contact, but how often does anyone check a linked in profile?  Finally, I found her name attached to a party at a gun range!  I remembered she told me she was starting a new job at a gun range… and there was a phone number.  I was so excited!  I called the number immediately, but was devastated when I heard a woman’s voice, “we’re sorry, but the number you have dialed has been disconnected…”

I was nearly in tears – trying to accept that I would never find her again and my hair would be forever just OK.  I decided to make one last ditch effort and find the main number for the gun range – perhaps someone would know where she went.  I dialed it as I tried to think of how I was going to convince someone that I wasn’t a crazy stalker and they should give me Meg’s personal contact information.  Someone answered, “Sandy Springs, this is Meg speaking.”  I almost couldn’t speak.  I found her!  “Hi Meg.  How are you?”  “Good, how may I help you?”

I felt so stupid.  How was I going to explain that I stalked her for yet a THIRD time and I was calling her at her new job?  “Um, this is Shaina”  “Shaina STAHL?!” She asked.  “Yes, and I’m sorry that I called you at work but you deactivated facebook and I….”  I trailed off as I heard her laughing hysterically on the other end.  “I’m flattered you looked for me again!”  I was relieved.  I know that I will never have to change hair stylists again.